Gracyn Blu Louis

gracyn blu louis

sometimes i write poetry because i have big feelings

please enjoy the thoughts of my adolescence and early adulthood

reader discretion advised: mature language and topics

I said

I would be the one to change

I feel

My parents

In my words

i prefer my life through my imagination

going back to your place

tea that never gets cold

it’s selfish

overly romantic

unrealistic

reality is left hurts and right is missing

stepping once stepping twice

reality is blinking and four days have gone by

father never came home

reality is new tattoos

self-inflicted

reality is

fuck you

s o m e t i m e s i m i s s m y t a t t o o s

One

Mistake

Forever

Unforgiven

Piles

Of

Hidden

Shame

They

Forgive

I

Never

Forget

THESE ARE NOT THE BEST YEARS OF OUR LIVES

Home

I am from green grass

white picket fences

broken branches and crunchy leaves

groundhogs under the shed

deer that peak through the window

I am from fresh zucchini

my uncle’s garden

and his clean handkerchief

grandma’s meatballs

I am from mom’s microwaved dinners

falling asleep next to my unfinished plate

waking up not knowing what day it is or what happened

I am from freshly painted shutters

pointy roofs with Christmas lights

damaged basements where we hide our strife

I am from secret dysfunction

he said she said

show your pearly whites

your mother’s fault

I am from a two stop light town

a one coffee shop town

a no escape town

the house is falling in

i smelt her ashes, created from her own guilt

I practiced my dance

On the wet dewy grass

Under the moonlight

No one else was awake

But I liked to think she was

Practicing her dance too

you have a black car

all the cars are black

or was it silver

all of the cars are silver

i got a new tattoo

so did you!

i like my tattoo

it reminds me that life is a choice

that’s comforting to me

but probably not to you

you have pride in your tattoo

i won’t show you my new tattoo

re: weirdly okay with being on the verge of death at all times

i got a new tattoo

all of the cars are black

i slept the whole way home

all of the cars are black

Know What You’re For

Oh sweet heart

Why so tired

Walk with bare feet

We’ve grown weary

Of intricacy

A gentle kiss holds the power

Of the mighty ocean

Make a thousand eyes

One

Be soft with you

You are your daughter

You are your son

Let my brother cry

Subtle aches

The beauty breaks my lungs

Broken circles

Loose strands

Of iridescent gold

Dance in your flowery kingdom

Stand on the toes

Of your own two feet

Dirty fingerprints

On glassy eyes

Chase your shadow

It is always a little more knowing than you

You struggle so gracefully

Stop trying so hard little one

The stars are at your feet

it feels as if i was just here last week

awaiting christmases of years past

same dish, same people, same drinks

is it supposed to be comforting?

the years go by like months used to

life is a series of nothings

time is relative

feelings are the same

towers

tall

short

glass

stone

strong

broken

leaning

to straighten itself

it consumes

what the straight regard

as unnatural

false

it stops consuming

it falls